Tag Archives: how to become a leader

Find Out How To Never Give Up

Feeling Like Giving Up? Read This Before You Do

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Originally Published on May 22, 2021By Christopher Fern


What do anger, shame, remorse, guilt, frustration, overwhelm, indecisiveness, scarcity, and fear all have in common? When an emotional response occurs, the amygdala – the part of the brain most often referred to as “snake brain” takes hold, causing you to “process” the emotions. What’s actually happening then is that we’re living a memory from the past in the now – a form of time travel: the mind knows no different.

It’s up to you how you want to leave it though. The way you feel is determined by how you linked those two things. The way you feel when you’re triggered again is about how you link them now. When you’re inspired, it’s the same except you’re applying excitement or fear to the life you could have, not the life you do.

Step 1 – Realize You’re Drunk and You Don’t Even Know It

In a recent study conducted by Harvard Scientists, “Bandwidth Tax” was discovered, and fundamentally means you’re walking around drunk. It also happens way sooner than you think. 

“[The] effects [of the two groups’ questions] correspond to between 13 and 14 IQ points. A gain of that many points can lift you from the category of “average” to “superior” intelligence. Or, if you move in the other direction, losing 13 points can take you from “average” to a category labeled “borderline-deficient.” In our studies, the same person has fewer IQ points when he or she is preoccupied with scarcity than when not. This cognitive penalty is the key to our story.” 

And when this happens, it’s a perpetual cycle. This is the origin of stress, burnout, or overwhelm lives here, and is perpetuated by it.

Step 2 – Notice Repetitive Decisions

In order to reduce bandwidth tax, you must reduce the number of things you’re paying attention to and the frequency at which you’re paying attention to them. To do so requires identifying repetitive patterns and minimizing them.

When I was a boy, my mother calculated her budget the same way every month – she pulled out her pen and paper, started with her fixed income, subtracted expenses, and hoped for the best. Same numbers, same math, different expectations. And to top it off, we always ran out of money! 

I couldn’t help but wonder, why was she acting as if anything else mattered other than what was left after bills? Her income didn’t change. The expenses didn’t change. But she kept running the same numbers, arriving at the same conclusion of having a certain amount left over, and doing it every month.

Don’t be like my late mother. Be on time. Take a look in these areas for repeating decisions:

  • Is there a consistent outcome – like cash flow with my mother? Focus on the abbreviated form you can trust.
  • Do you find that you spend impulsively under certain conditions? You can predict the conditions and the impulse. 
  • Are you using lists? Despite popular opinion, lists create bandwidth tax. Best to find a way to minimize what you see at once. 
“Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.” – Thomas Edison

Step 3 – Create a Metric

You need a metric to measure your effectiveness. Metrics give you measurable and attainable ways to recognize improvements.

Some examples are:

  • In the case of my dearly departed mother:  “cash leftover” or “time it takes to budget” could be the result of the consolidation we just discussed. 
  • With Bandwidth Tax the metric is IQ.
  • Time is always a good metric because it’s the only thing we’re limited by. It can also apply to almost anything that causes inconvenience.

This metric should be how you measure all decisions of the same type. It’s the thing that tells you if you’re essentially 4 beers in, just 1, or none at all. It’s something that should be countable but has to apply to your situation. This will create meaning in your productivity.

Step 4 – Batch Process

Now that we have metrics for all of these things that cause Bandwidth Tax, we can go even further. How can we begin to manage all of the metrics? Simple – batch processing. 

I remember in high school I saw a teacher grading papers, and he was grading all of them at once – literally.  “By grading all of the questions 1 first, then all of the question 2’, it’s much faster because my mind doesn’t have to keep ‘question switching’“ he said when I asked why. This stuck with me, and it began my deep dive into this phenomenon.

Also known as Chunking, batch processing allows us to focus on doing things of a similar type over time to reduce bandwidth tax. It’s very similar to keeping that paper to budget, then using it for another family member. The goal with Chunking is to make it seem to your mind like all of the tasks you’re doing are so similar they might as well be the same, thereby reducing Bandwidth Tax. This is like focus, but further.

Step 5 – Ritual

But we can go, even so, one step further. And this is the step that will solidify the claim that we can trust our decisions in any state. This is the principle of Habitualization, or simple – Ritual. 

This step involves making a groove in your mind so clearly – a groove that represents the stepwise, never-changing, very simple WAY of doing a thing that depends heavily on all that we’ve talked about.  A ritual, or habit, tells the mind that it can, fundamentally, consider something so trustworthy it can be ignored. This is the opposite of bandwidth tax. 

With any of the things we’ve worked on in this article, ask yourself how you might be able to “program” them into you. If there are changes to consider, can you consider them all at once?

 

Those programs are going to be the new subconscious, controlling the amygdala, and to do all 5 of these steps will make the thing that once made you act as if you were drunk seem like you’re simply taking a sip of wonderful spring water. RELATED TOPICS:BANDWIDTH TAXCLARITYCLEAR MINDFEELINGSGIVING UPINTERNAL PROGRAMSMINDSETTHOUGHTSUP NEXTThe Secret to Your Weekly SuccessDON’T MISSBurnout Is Real. Here Are Five Strategies to Manage It

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Christopher Fern

Christopher Fern is an author, inventor, and entrepreneur. His innovative approaches to coaching, education, and psychology fueled the creation of Mindful Money, a self-mastery platform that effectively aligns responsibility, values, feelings, and impulses regardless of your emotional state have resulted in his being featured in media such as Shefik Presents Invocation, The Good Men Project, the Sourcitarian Summit, Thrive Global, and more. To Christopher, being aware of our weaknesses is as important as our strengths, as they provide the Bias Blueprint for us to know where and how to fit in the world. To learn more, visit christopherfern.com and practicemindfulmoney.com.

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Giving up Is Not an Option! How to Not Give up and Stay Motivated (lifehack.org)


How to Become a Leader

10 Traits an Inspired Leader Must Have
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Originally Published on Apr 10, 2021 ByMarie Barnes


Leading people is not an easy task. A thousand and one responsibilities fall on your shoulders. After all, leaders are the safeguard against chaos. They are the engine of a group. What defines a great leader? An upright stance and a proud poise? Intelligence and valiance? The will of steel and steadfast determination? Often, we seek something in the leaders we lack. However, different challenges require different qualities from a chief. So, we may spend days enumerating all the possible traits a leader could have. There is no limit to perfection. Instead, we will concentrate on a specific side of a leader – his attitude towards the others.

The way you treat people makes them respond accordingly. Obviously, you can choose the path of tyranny, fear, and oppression to be an effective leader. You will force people to do things, they will obey, and technically you are a leader. But this is a slippery slope. Coup d’états and rebellions are the results of such leadership. If you want to be the one that people follow deliberately and with loyalty, you should possess the next traits. 

1. Determination

Let’s start with the obvious. You must be determined enough to get somewhere and not give up on the way. A determination is an obligatory minimum for a leader. People will not follow if you cannot move forward. They need inspiration, and you give it to them through action. 

2. Responsibility

Being a leader means you are responsible for the team. Every member of your group confides in your decision-making abilities. You cannot let them down. Your purpose is to lead them. In other words, wherever your team ends up, it is your victory or failure. You are the face of your group. When everything goes to hell, you are the first to meet the devil. If you can bear that burden, the leadership is for you.

“A leader is one who knows the way, goes the way, and shows the way.” — John Maxwell

 

3. Genuine Empathy

Empathy is how well you can understand the emotions of others. It is the key to successful relations with anyone. If you feel what another person feels, you can better navigate through the reality of that person. Understanding their pain, you are more prone to help – it is becoming personal for you. 

There are many ways to show empathy: listen more, be attentive to others, do not judge hastily. It is not about forgetting your problems and turning into the selfless altruist to the end of your days. It is about paying attention. Just give a bit of your warmth to others along the way and try to understand them. Maybe, you can help them somehow. People remember such things, and they will respect you.

4. Positivity

Positivity is a useful tool. We all have dark moments in our lives, and unless we have a light with us, it is easy to get lost in the darkness. The moodiness stretches out, everything is dull and gloomy, and irritation takes its place. We snap at each other, but nothing resolves. Ill humor is a tricky enemy: it makes you forget about good times and joy. If you can fight that with optimism, then you have a torch to lead others through the darkness. People will seek your company to get warmer, and they will be happy to have you as their leader. 

5. Open-mindedness

You should not be close-minded, being intolerant to different people or ideas. If you cannot accept something new, alien, or better because of your personal preferences, fear, or pride, you will have problems. Times are a-changin’, as Bob Dylan sang, and so is the world. To keep up with the innumerous trends and progress, you need to get on board with it. Also, it simplifies your communication with other people as their personality does not affect your judgment.

6. Ability to Learn

This is the logical continuation of the previous paragraph. The ability to grow, adapt, and acquire new skills is a must for a leader. Learning from your mistakes is another thing. Everyone makes mistakes. Leaders do as well. However, accepting your failures and learning from them is important. Do not let ignorance take hold of you.

7. Straightforwardness

Sometimes, team members can make a mistake. Do you have it in yourself to show them their fault? Can you reprimand or fire someone if the need arises? You are responsible for your team, remember? If someone jeopardizes its future, you must deal with this person. You cannot play only a good cop here. 

8. Humility

Can you bide your mistakes? Can you ask for help from your fellow team member? Your ego and pride should not stand in your way. You are not some infallible machine that should perform flawlessly. You cannot know everything. A team works as one, and you are a part of it – ask for advice or support when needed.

 

9. Approachability

Other team members should not fear coming up to you. If they are afraid of reaching out, you have a lack of trust. It might lead to secrets and unspoken words. Secrets are bombs with a long fuse, of which you do not know. To avoid that, you need to establish an open-door policy. Work on your relationship with the team: your leadership depends on it. 

“The price of greatness is responsibility.” – Winston Churchill

10. Self-care

The final point is all about yourself. To be the most effective, you should care about your well-being. Your physical and mental health are the fuel of your energy. You cannot be optimistic, think a few steps ahead, make decisions, and be an inspiring example for others when your mind and soul are in the wrong place. 

We often tend to forget about the need for rest and recreation, joy and happiness while pursuing our professional growth. There should be enough sunlight and alimentation for a plant to grow. There should also be enough good things for you to live on and succeed. 

Congratulations, if you have all those traits within yourself. You should be good at leading others. If there is something you lack, do not get upset – everything can be learned and practiced to perfection. Look it up on the internet. You can find all the answers there. 

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Marie Barnes

Marie Barnes is a Marketing Communication Manager at Adsy and an enthusiastic blogger interested in writing about technology, social media, work, travel, lifestyle, and current affairs. She shares her insights through blogging. Follow her on Medium.

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Leadership Traits – List of Top Qualities of an Effective Leader (corporatefinanceinstitute.com)